To Have Faith Is To Have Wings

"The reasons birds can fly and we can't is simply because they have perfect faith. To have faith is to have wings."
-J.M. Barrie

Two weekends ago, my husband and I spent some time out in Lancaster, PA with my in laws. We stayed at an adorable B&B and enjoyed exploring Amish country. I will be posting more about our trip at a future date, but felt impressed to share a special photo from it now. But first I need to give you some background info for you to understand the significance. 

I've written before about the life changing car accident I was in when I was 17 and how I lost one of my best friends, Makenzie, in it. That experience has shaped me in so many ways. I find that I'm still growing and healing from it and I'll probably always will be.  We were on the way home from one of my very first photoshoots when we were hit and Kenzie was instantly killed. I have no memory of the accident, due to a severe concussion (and thanks to God!) My camera was ruined but fortunately the memory card and the photos on it were salvaged. I have no memory of the following, but just moments before we were hit in the accident I took a photo in mid intersection. Knowing me, I looked up, saw those breathtaking clouds, and snapped a quick photo. Weeks after the accident when I had posted the photos from the shoot online I included this cloud image. Many friends commented saying how beautiful it was and that the clouds looked like a little window into heaven. After several comments were made, another friend pointed out that the cloud on the right looked like a hand stretched out. She remarked that it was as if God was saying, "Makenzie, take my hand. I'm taking you home." 

A few months after the accident occurred I was photographing Madi, a dear friend of Kenzie and I's, in Galveston at sunrise. Madi had brought a white rose, a flower we associate with our Kenzie angel. Madi wore a leotard and pointe shoes. I counted off "1, 2, and 3!" and she jumped high into the air. The shutter clicked away. I was mesmerized with the image and called her over to look at it. I was pleased to see the grin that spread across her face as she looked at my display screen. "Caitlin, you see that seagull flying in the background?" she asked. "That's Makenzie." And now whenever I see a bird in any of my images I can't help but think that its Makenzie making her presence known in my photos.

So back to Lancaster... The highlight of the trip for me was the Sunset Scooter tour we went on. Josh and I shared a "scoot coupe" and our tour guide led us through the beautiful hills of Amish country. I took a gazillion photos of the many hillsides, horse and buggies, farmland, trees, and pretty clouds we passed- I can't wait to share the images with you! Afterwards as I was uploading the images to my computer, I found myself staring at a certain set of landscapes I photographed. The sky had just starting to turn pink and was surrounded by the wide open Amish farmlands. I hadn't originally noticed it while taking the images, but as I looked at them on my computer later I stared at the lone cloud in the sky which seemed to resemble a bird flying through the air. I couldn't stop looking at it. Once again I found myself thinking, "That's Makenzie." She was making her way into my photos once again, this time through the beauty of a bird shaped cloud soaring above. It amazes me that 7 and a half years later little things that remind me of her can bring tears to my eyes, in the most beautiful way. I see her everywhere and in everything. She is the inspiration for all that I do and I know I was kept on this earth for a purpose, part of it being to share her story. So as I take in the beauty of this cloud in the sky that reminds me of her I can't help but think its her way of saying hello and that she misses me just as much as I miss her. Life is a beautiful thing and I feel so blessed for the friendship and lessons she continues to bring to me.